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doctor recommend that older people should get regular exercise. however, many older people do not take enough exercise. what could be the reasons for this? what can be done to encourage them to take excerise ?

doctor recommend that older people should get regular exercise. however, many older people do not take enough exercise. what could be the reasons for this? what can be done to encourage them to take excerise? wVXn
exercise is necessary to being a healthy but elders do not workout because they think it is wastage of time. This essay is going to discuss about the cause and solutions in further paragraphs. To commence with, senior citizens do not aware about the benefits of exercise. They think, health can be improved by participate in domestic work. For example, the physical health of farmers are well maintain because they make physical affords in their farms. Addition to, elders have not knowledge about the techniques that how to perform exercise also they have not any instructor who guide them about right methods and optimistic effect of physical workout. Further, older want to spend more time with their friends in the last day of their life so that they do not want utilize their time on other activities. Every problem has solution. Government should organize the campus for the mature individuals where they are guided by the experts about the right methods and positive effect of workout. For instance, as if the health campus are conducted for the check up of the health, as same the exercise event should carry out which encourage aged people to being a part of this event. Moreover, family member ought to insist to the ancestors for utilize sometimes on physical activities. To conclude, aged individuals should give first preference to their health and spend few hours for warmup or exercise and they should also teach by the family member so that which help them to enhance the strength of body.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
exercise
is necessary to being a healthy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
elders do not workout
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is wastage of time. This essay is going to
Did you mean simply "discuss the"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about the
cause and solutions in
further
paragraphs.

To commence with, senior citizens do not aware about the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
by participate in domestic work.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
of farmers are well
Consider using a past participle here: "maintained".
maintain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
affords in their farms. Addition to, elders have not knowledge about the techniques that how to perform
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
also
they have not any instructor who guide them about right methods and optimistic effect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
workout.
Further
, older want to spend more time with their friends in the last day of their life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they do not
Probably a preposition is missing after 'want'.
want utilize
their time on other activities.

Every problem has solution.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should organize the campus for the mature individuals where they
are guided
by the experts about the right methods and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect of workout.
For instance
, as if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
campus
are conducted
for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
up of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
, as same the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
should carry out which encourage aged
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
Did you mean "be"?
being
a part of this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
.
Moreover
, family member ought to insist to the ancestors for utilize
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
activities.

To conclude
, aged individuals should give
first
preference to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and spend few hours for
Possible spelling mistake found.
warmup
or
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
exercise and
they should
also
teach by the family member
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to enhance the strength of body.
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IELTS essay doctor recommend that older people should get regular exercise. however, many older people do not take enough exercise. what could be the reasons for this? what can be done to encourage them to take excerise?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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