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Directors of large organization earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees do some people think it is necessary but others hold that it is unfair.discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Directors of large organization earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees do some people think it is necessary but others hold that it is unfair. 8r6P
Childhood is the crucial and a base of any human, it should be spent in a good way. One school of thought assert that staying at one place in a whole childhood is a more beneficial, while others have a opinion that different place give more advantages; however, I opine that staying in a single place provide a more bright sides in growth of offsprings and the reason for my inclination are articulated in trail paragraphs. First and foremost the reason to support my ideology is that if juveniles bring up at a single place then there is no need of changing a school frequently because when children are transfered in a different schools, they have to adjust in new ambience and with the new peers, which is a difficult task and it gives the adverse effect on their study. Moreover, teaching method is vary in a every school so, they have to compromise in it and there may chance they cannot adopt different methods. Another relevant argument to support my perception is that staying at a single place for a several years, children are attached with that place and atmosphere. They become familiar with it and find that place that there own, as a result, they are become more open as they are comfortable and they can enhance their other skills in which they get satisfaction. Nonetheless, although it gives bad effect on child's career and education. Some parents give support to change place because they have thought when child move in another place and culture they can learn more about a country and how to shape into different place, but it is a waste of time and if they secure this time in a study at one place give a wide range of knowledge and culture via books and mobile. In conclusion, staying at one place is a better for children and their Bright Career, moving at a different place has no extra benefits.
Childhood is the crucial and a base of any human, it should
be spent
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way. One
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
assert that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
at one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
in a whole childhood is a more beneficial, while others have
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
more advantages;
however
, I opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
in a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
provide a more bright sides in growth of
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
and the reason for my inclination
are articulated
in trail paragraphs.

First
and foremost the reason to support my ideology is that if juveniles bring up at a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
then there is no need of changing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
frequently
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when children are
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "transferred", the past tense form of the verb 'transfer'?
transfered
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "school"?
schools
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
adjust in new ambience and with the new peers, which is a difficult task and it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
the adverse effect on their study.
Moreover
, teaching method is
Consider using a past participle here: "varied".
vary
in
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
compromise in it and there may chance they cannot adopt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
methods.

Another relevant argument to support my perception is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
at a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
for a several
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "year"?
years
, children
are attached
with that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
and atmosphere. They become familiar with it and find that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
that there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
,
as a result
, they
are become
more open as they are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
comfortable and
they can enhance their other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in which they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
satisfaction.

Nonetheless, although it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effect on child's career and education.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
support to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
when child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
in another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
and culture they can learn more about a country and how to shape into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is a waste of time and if they secure this time in a study at one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
a wide range of knowledge and culture via books and mobile.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staying
at one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
is a better for children and their Bright Career, moving at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
has no extra benefits.
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IELTS essay Directors of large organization earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees do some people think it is necessary but others hold that it is unfair.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
326 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Directors of large organization earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees do some people think it is necessary but others hold that it is unfair.discuss both the views and give your opinion.