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Competition has been shown to be useful up to a certain point and no further, but cooperation, which is the thing we must strive for today, begins where competition leaves off. Is cooperation ultimately more successful than competition?

Competition has been shown to be useful up to a certain point and no further, but cooperation, which is the thing we must strive for today, begins where competition leaves off. Is cooperation ultimately more successful than competition? VwqN3
While competition has undoubtedly garnered a healthy amount of advocates, mainly for its role as a motivation, a large proportion of the modern community is expressing the belief that cooperation is the superior means of achieving ultimate success. Personally, I firmly concur with such a statement, in what follows, I shall give ground to my belief. To begin with, cooperation eliminates the persistent pressure induced by a competitive mindset. Unlike competition, which primarily involves individual victories and achievements at the expenses of others’ failures and losses, cooperation focuses on the process of joining efforts to achieve a mutually beneficial result for each and every individual. In other words, members are no longer under the constant pressure to excel and outperform their peers in order to success, instead they are allowed to collaborate and collectively contribute to the achievement of ultimate success, which is also equally distributed among those involved. Consequently, team members can effortlessly contribute their strengths and individualized skills to accumulate a generally more productive and fulfilling working and learning environment. Cooperation is thus the best tool for upholding the general interests, making it superior to competition as a means of achieving excellence. Furthermore, collaboration facilitates the acquisition and development of invaluable skills and knowledge that cannot be cultivated in a competition-driven manner. By actively partaking in the process of collaborating with others, overcoming obstacles and ultimately achieving success, individuals can acquire prized skills such as leadership, effective communication as well social relationship building. These skill-sets, which are critically absent in the means of competing, are becoming progressively more essential due to the shift towards a more team-oriented education and business world. These highly essential skills promote efficiency and productivity usually in ways more advanced than competition allows. Hence, cooperation is a much superior means of working and achieving success, compared to a competition-driven approach. The above analysis has already underscored the merits of my belief. It is now crystal clear that in order to reap desirable results, especially in such a team-oriented society, individual should acquire themselves the ability to cooperate with others.
While
competition
has
undoubtedly
garnered a healthy amount of advocates,
mainly
for its role as a motivation, a large proportion of the modern community is expressing the belief that
cooperation
is the superior
means
of
achieving
ultimate
success
.
Personally
, I
firmly
concur with such a statement, in what follows, I shall give ground to my belief.

To
begin
with,
cooperation
eliminates the persistent pressure induced by a competitive mindset. Unlike
competition
, which
primarily
involves
individual
victories and achievements at the expenses of others’ failures and losses,
cooperation
focuses on the process of joining efforts to achieve a
mutually
beneficial result for each and every
individual
. In
other
words, members are no longer under the constant pressure to excel and outperform their peers in order to
success
,
instead
they are
allowed
to collaborate and
collectively
contribute to the achievement of ultimate
success
, which is
also
equally
distributed among those involved.
Consequently
, team members can
effortlessly
contribute their strengths and individualized
skills
to accumulate a
generally
more productive and fulfilling working and learning environment.
Cooperation
is
thus
the best tool for upholding the general interests, making it superior to
competition
as a
means
of
achieving
excellence.

Furthermore
, collaboration facilitates the acquisition and development of invaluable
skills
and knowledge that cannot
be cultivated
in a competition-driven manner. By
actively
partaking in the process of collaborating with others, overcoming obstacles and
ultimately
achieving
success
,
individuals
can acquire prized
skills
such as leadership, effective communication
as well
social relationship building. These
skill
-sets, which are
critically
absent in the
means
of competing, are becoming
progressively
more essential due to the shift towards a more team-oriented education and business world. These
highly
essential
skills
promote efficiency and productivity
usually
in ways more advanced than
competition
allows
.
Hence
,
cooperation
is a much superior
means
of working and
achieving
success
, compared to a competition-driven approach.

The above analysis has already underscored the merits of my belief. It is
now
crystal
clear
that in order to reap desirable results,
especially
in such a team-oriented society,
individual
should acquire themselves the ability to cooperate with others.
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IELTS essay Competition has been shown to be useful up to a certain point and no further, but cooperation, which is the thing we must strive for today, begins where competition leaves off. Is cooperation ultimately more successful than competition?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
345 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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