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Can you write something about pleasure of writing

Can you write something about pleasure of writing jDKGL
If you are an English learner, absolutely you will know how important reading is because it gives us lots of benefits as well as pleasures. First, as you can see, reading a book lets people know more about the world, about how our life is activating, how we were born for long times ago or millions of interesting lessons. Base on the knowledge that people read through books or even news, websites, they can explore themself. A person who still wonders or has a big question about their life or their careers will determine exactly what they are purchasing for then being successful with it. Not only that pleasure, but reading also brings people to their pure imagination world and can heal their mental health. Through the comics, fairy tales, the innocent children are brought up with unreal stories which make them happy every single night before going to sleep. However, people grow up, they have to cope with stress in overloading work or financial burden, every day they live in hustle and bustle world. Then just only a small cute childish story can make them smile and be more optimistic, they may feel relieved. Finally, reading books can boost up our knowledge in many aspects, it is necessary for people to learn more things enhance and improve themself. In general, I can say that reading books really has a lot of pleasures.
If you are an English learner,
absolutely
you will know how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it gives us lots of benefits
as well
as pleasures.
First
, as you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lets
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
know more about the world, about how our life is activating, how we
were born
for long times ago or millions of interesting lessons. Base on the knowledge that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
read through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
or even news, websites, they can explore
The term is non-standard and not widely accepted.
themself
. A person who
still
wonders or has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
question about their life or their careers will determine exactly what they are purchasing for then being successful with it. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
that pleasure,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
also
brings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to their pure imagination world and can heal their mental health. Through the comics, fairy tales, the innocent children
are brought
up with unreal stories which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them happy every single night
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
going to sleep.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
grow up, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
cope with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
in overloading work or financial burden, every day they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in hustle and bustle world. Then
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
cute childish story can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them smile and be more optimistic, they may feel relieved.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
can boost up our knowledge in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects, it is necessary for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to learn more things enhance and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
The term is non-standard and not widely accepted.
themself
.
In general
, I can say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
really
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
pleasures.
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IELTS essay Can you write something about pleasure of writing

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
233 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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