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Big problems in breeding dog industry

Big problems in breeding dog industry GMo3e
In an overview, in this speech and reading discussed about big problem in dog industry and drawbacks and benefits of it. Deliberately, the essential indications in the lecture cast doubt on the fundamental points in the reading. First of all, the lecture states that the too many dog breeders are lack in both an understandin science an sense of ethics. So, they are unqualified and just generate dogs for profit in backyard and dont mind to dog welfare. However, this is contrasts the topic in reading that the asserts that the breeders love dogs and contribute to their welfare. Furthermore, about to delve breed purity, the lecture declares that the firmly focus on breed purity leads to inbreeding and genetics disorder such as hip and bone problems, heart condition, deafness and so on. Also lecture criticizes of the role of breed registries in promoting breed purity. Although, this is opposite with clues of the reading that clearly indicates dog breeders use genetics beneficially and claim favorably of breed registries. Finally, the lecture concluded that the culture of dog breeding is responsible for proliferation of puppy population that produce an overpopulation of dogs, causing to more unwanted dogs. While, this challenges the content in the text that the promotion of dog breeds encourages responsible dog ownership.
In an overview, in this speech and reading discussed about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
problem in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dog
industry and drawbacks and benefits of it.
Deliberately
, the essential indications in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lecture
cast doubt on the fundamental points in the reading.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lecture
states that the too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dog
breeders are lack in both an
Possible spelling mistake found.
understandin
science
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
sense of ethics.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they
are unqualified
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
generate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dogs
for profit in backyard and
Possible spelling mistake found
dont
mind to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dog
welfare.
However
, this is contrasts the topic in reading that the asserts that the breeders
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dogs
and contribute to their welfare.

Furthermore
, about to delve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breed
purity, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lecture
declares that the
firmly
focus on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breed
purity leads to inbreeding and genetics disorder such as hip and bone problems, heart condition, deafness and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Also


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
lecture
criticizes of the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breed
registries in promoting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breed
purity. Although, this is opposite with clues of the reading that
clearly
indicates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dog
breeders
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
genetics
beneficially
and claim
favorably
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breed
registries.

Finally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lecture
concluded that the culture of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dog
breeding is responsible for proliferation of puppy population that produce an overpopulation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dogs
, causing to more unwanted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dogs
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, this challenges the content in the text that the promotion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dog
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breeds
encourages responsible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dog
ownership.

IELTS essay Big problems in breeding dog industry

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
215 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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