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As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual well-being. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual well-being. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers? ljR2o
Job satisfaction is believed to play a vital role in people's well-being owing to the fact that many individuals put a large portion of their adulthood's time on work. In my opinion, serval can lead to job satisfaction. However, never will all jobholders become fully satisfied even if all necessary conditions are provided. I elaborate them in this essay. Handfuls of factors are attributed to job satisfaction among employees. To begin with, the most compelling factors is financial security. That is to say, high wages, pension are bound to make individuals more cheerful. In many instances in which the staff are not satisfied with their salary, they may fall into huge financial debts which can lead people to depression and loss of job satisfaction. Moreover, a friendly atmosphere between colleagues can also contribute to job satisfaction. To put it differently, the more friendly relationships are forged in workplaces, the higher job satisfaction can be achieved. Nevertheless, it is inconceivable that all workers become fully satisfied. The most rational justification is that some individuals become tedious after doing the same job. In other words, they find their career monotonous, wanting to change their job. But not only do they find it difficult to change their career, but also it would be hard to acclimatize themselves to new job. Therefore, they remain at same job in which they do not consider getting engaged. Moreover, some just do a career so as to make ends meet while they are not interested in their job. To conclude, a high salary and a friendly atmosphere are some of the important factors which can contribute to job satisfaction. Nonetheless, it is impossible to reach 100 per cent job satisfaction in all workers.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is believed
to play a vital role in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's well-being owing to the fact that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals put a large portion of their adulthood's time on work. In my opinion,
Possible spelling mistake found.
serval
can lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
.
However
, never will all jobholders become
fully
satisfied even if all necessary conditions
are provided
. I elaborate them in this essay.

Handfuls of factors
are attributed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
among employees. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the most compelling factors is financial security.
That is
to say, high wages, pension
are bound
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
individuals more cheerful. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
instances in which the staff are not satisfied with their salary, they may fall into huge financial debts which can lead
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to depression and loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
.
Moreover
, a friendly atmosphere between colleagues can
also
contribute to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
. To put it
differently
, the more friendly relationships
are forged
in workplaces, the higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
can
be achieved
.

Nevertheless
, it is inconceivable that all workers become
fully
satisfied. The most rational justification is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals become tedious after doing the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
In other words
, they find their career monotonous, wanting to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do they find it difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their career,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to acclimatize themselves to new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
Therefore
, they remain at same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in which they do not consider getting engaged.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
do a career
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
ends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
while they are not interested in their job.

To conclude
, a high salary and a friendly atmosphere are
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factors which can contribute to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
. Nonetheless, it is impossible to reach 100 per cent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
in all workers.
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IELTS essay As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual well-being. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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