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Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life?

Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? BJMQX
Famous people specific on social media, are shearing their whole life during the day with their fans. That make their fans sometimes control their life, and it is the price of their fame that can not cover their privete life. Some of them dose not matter what kind of people are watching their content, they are children or tenageers? , they filmed things thay did not showed by kids. And now days the famous peolpe be came famous not because they are doing something cool or they genius. Unfortunatlely with out reasons that can make them special. And the reasons that I have been seeing that make people be came famous, just because his family is rich and he owns fancy cars, or she is vary beautiful and fancy makup prand contract with her to be the face of the prand. And some familys force their kids to be famous, and makes him taking as adults or doing something fany and more just to make many out of the them. In my opinion, the influencer is the one and only who is can control the limits of him life that want from people to show or not, and himself can determine the level of the privacy that he want to shearing in the social media or not. Finally, I want to tell influencer that you have to be smart and use your mind before filming, because your recording maybe it will use aginst you not now but maybe in futuer. And I want say to people that do not follow people with out massage.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
specific on social media, are shearing their whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
during the day with their fans. That
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
their fans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
control their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, and it is the price of their fame that can not cover their
Possible spelling mistake found.
privete
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of them dose not matter what kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are watching their content, they are children or
Possible spelling mistake found.
tenageers
?
Loose punctuation mark.
,
they filmed things
Possible spelling mistake found.
thay
did not
The verb 'did' requires the base form of the verb: "show"
showed
by kids.

And
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
days the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
Possible spelling mistake found.
peolpe
be
Consider using a past participle here: "come".
came
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are doing something
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
cool or
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they genius
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Unfortunatlely
This word is usually written together. Did you mean "without"?
with out
reasons that can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them special. And the reasons that I have been seeing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
be came
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
his family is
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
rich and
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owns
fancy cars, or she is
Did you mean "very"?
vary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and fancy
Possible spelling mistake found.
makup
Possible spelling mistake found.
prand
contract with her to be the face of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
prand
. And
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "families", the plural form of the noun 'family'?
familys
force their kids to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
him taking as adults or doing something
Possible spelling mistake found.
fany
and more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
out of
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "them"?
the them
.

In my opinion, the influencer is the one and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
who is can control the limits of him
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
or not, and himself can determine the level of the privacy that he
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
Did you mean "shear"?
shearing
in the social media or not.

Finally
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
influencer that you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be smart and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
your mind
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
filming,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
your recording maybe it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
Possible spelling mistake found.
aginst
you not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
maybe in
Possible spelling mistake found.
futuer
. And I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
say to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that do not follow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This word is usually written together. Did you mean "without"?
with out
massage.
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IELTS essay Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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