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Air travel is much cheaper nowadays. Some people think this will help people to go further, while others think this will make more people travel by air and thus causing the environmental problems. Discuss two views and give your opinion.

Air travel is much cheaper nowadays. Some people think this will help people to go further, while others think this will make more people travel by air and thus causing the environmental problems. Discuss two views and give your opinion. jRDap
As a descendant of Fu-chian, which is a region located in the east part of China, my grandfather always tells me lots of adventurous stories about how he sailed to Taiwan 50 years ago, when time was harsh and navigation was risky. Nevertheless, these experiences are difficult for me to imagine due to the convenience of air travel nowadays. As air travel has thrived and becoming more affordable to ordinary people, they would go farer to places they wouldn’t go before. This has colossal influences on people’s life in social, economic as well as political aspects. Distinct cultures collide. . .
As a descendant of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Fu-chian
, which is a region located in the east part of China, my grandfather always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tells
me lots of adventurous stories about how he sailed to Taiwan 50 years ago, when time was harsh and navigation was risky.
Nevertheless
, these experiences are difficult for me to imagine due to the convenience of air travel nowadays.

As air travel has thrived and becoming more affordable to ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, they would go
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "farther", the comparative form of the adjective 'far'?
farer
to places they wouldn’t go
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. This has colossal influences on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s life in social, economic
as well
as political aspects. Distinct cultures collide.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.

IELTS essay Air travel is much cheaper nowadays. Some people think this will help people to go further, while others think this will make more people travel by air and thus causing the environmental problems. Discuss two views and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
101 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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