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Age discrimination occurs when decision is made on person's age

Age discrimination occurs when decision is made on person's age DlaXo
Recently, the phenomenon of age discrimination and its corresponding impacts have sparked a heated debate. Although contested by many that the significance of complex procedure is highly beneficial, such issue is regarded thoroughly both constructive and consequently positive by substantial numbers of individuals. I am inclined to believe that decision making can be a plus and I will analyze that throughout this essay. From a general standpoint, person's age can provide the society with some noticeable effects which are rooted in the fact that crucial issues, as well as ultimate outcomes, are inextricably bound up. According to my own experience, when I was a university student, I performed an academic experiment which discovered current policies. Thus, the beneficial ramifications of both underestimating the power of young people and the capability of older man apparently can be seen. Within the realm of a public arena, social equality might increase the consequences of social responsibility. As a tangible example, some scientific research undertaken by a prestigious university has asserted that the downside of creative processes is correlated with negative issues. Hence, it is correct to presume the preconceived notion of this remarkable phenomenon. To conclude, while there are several compelling arguments on both sides, I profoundly believe that the benefits of improving capability far outweigh its drawbacks. Not only do the advantages of this unique phenomenon prove the significance of total outcomes but also pinpoint thorny issues' potential implications.
Recently, the phenomenon of age discrimination and its corresponding impacts have sparked a heated debate. Although contested by
many
that the significance of complex procedure is
highly
beneficial, such issue
is regarded
thoroughly
both constructive and
consequently
positive
by substantial numbers of individuals. I
am inclined
to believe that
decision making
can be a plus and I will analyze that throughout this essay.

From a general standpoint, person's age can provide the society with
some
noticeable effects which
are rooted
in the fact that crucial issues,
as well
as ultimate outcomes, are
inextricably
bound up. According to my
own
experience, when I was a university student, I performed an academic experiment which discovered
current
policies.
Thus
, the beneficial ramifications of both underestimating the power of young
people
and the capability of older
man
apparently
can be
seen
.

Within the realm of a public arena, social equality might increase the consequences of social responsibility. As a tangible example,
some
scientific research undertaken by a prestigious university has asserted that the downside of creative processes
is correlated
with
negative
issues.
Hence
, it is correct to presume the preconceived notion of this remarkable phenomenon.

To conclude
, while there are several compelling arguments on both sides, I
profoundly
believe that the benefits of improving capability far outweigh its drawbacks. Not
only
do the advantages of this unique phenomenon prove the significance of total outcomes
but
also
pinpoint thorny issues' potential implications.
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IELTS essay Age discrimination occurs when decision is made on person's age

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
237 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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