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the two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010

the two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010 Poep
These maps illustrate the way to a City Hospital in two different years, 2007 and 2010. The first map represents the City hospital in 2007, while the second one shows the same place three years later. Overall, the maps display significant changes between two periods of time. The most important in 2010 are the roundabouts located in the principal principal access to the hospital (Ring Road) and the other one in the south that connect City Road and Hospital Rd. On the one hand, In the first map, there are a corner among City road and Hospital Rd, specifically in the south. Then, we can see that in Hospital Road in the east, there is parking for personnel and public. After that, Hospital Ave is connected immediately with City Hospital. On the other hand, 3 years later we can observe that there is a roundabout that permits the principal access to the Hospital Road. However, the map in 2010 shows a park car only for staff in the east, and the opposite of this there is a bus station in the west. In front of the City Hospital, there is a second roundabout that connects Hospital Road to the Hospital. In the northeast of the map, there is a public parking located next to the health establishment.
These
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maps
illustrate the way to a City
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Hospital
in two
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different
years, 2007 and 2010. The
first
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map
represents the City
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hospital
in 2007, while the second one
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shows
the same place three years later.

Overall
, the
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maps
display significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
between two periods of time. The most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in 2010 are the roundabouts located in the
Possible typo: you repeated a word
principal principal
access to the
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hospital
(Ring
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Road)
and the other one in the south that connect City
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Road
and
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Hospital
Rd.

On the one hand, In the
first
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map
, there are a
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corner
among City
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road
and
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Hospital
Rd,
specifically
in the south. Then, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Road
in the east, there is parking for personnel and public. After that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
Ave
is connected
immediately with City Hospital.

On the other hand
, 3 years later we can observe that there is a roundabout that permits the principal access to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Road
.
However
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
map
in 2010
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
a park car
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for staff in the east, and the opposite of this there is a bus station in the west. In front of the City
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
, there is a second roundabout that connects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Road
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
. In the northeast of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
map
, there is a public parking located
next
to the health establishment.
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IELTS academic the two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
217 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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