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The survey finds the opinion about shops and restaurant in shopping mall in New Zealand

The survey finds the opinion about shops and restaurant in shopping mall in New Zealand 66ERr
The outcome of a survey intended to find out people's opinion about shops restaurants in new mall in New Zealand is illustrated in rendered grid representation and circle diagram depicts the visitors attitude towards design. In consideration of of overall prospective it is clear the satisfaction rate of individual surpassed the unsatisfaction in all three service shops restaurant and the design of fresh shopping centre. At fleeting glance it is crystal clear that 17% of male word extremely pleased from the shops where as females were its double around a half of both the genders was satisfied from the shops moreover one in 5 but this satisfied about shops and same proportion of women in addition 18% man and 9% women refused to give no any comment respectively. Moving for the to another table that around a quarter of both male and female were very satisfied furthermore 55% male and 32% female work pleased with the quality and service around 20% of both the gender gave no any comments addition to pie chart 62% of all interviewers male and female world very satisfied the proportion of those who are not pleased or had no any comment ranged between 20%.
The outcome of a survey intended to find out
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's opinion about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
restaurants in new mall in New Zealand
is illustrated
in rendered grid representation and circle diagram depicts the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "visitors'" or "visitor's"?
visitors
attitude towards design. In consideration
Possible typo: you repeated a word
of of
overall
prospective it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
the satisfaction rate of individual surpassed the unsatisfaction in all three service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
restaurant and the design of fresh shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
. At fleeting glance it is crystal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that 17% of male word
extremely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
pleased
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
Did you mean "whereas"?
where as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
were its double around a half of both the genders was
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satisfied
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
moreover
one in 5
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this
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satisfied
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
and same proportion of women
in addition
18%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
and 9% women refused to give
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
any comment
respectively
. Moving for the to another table that around a quarter of both male and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfied
furthermore
55% male and 32%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
pleased
with the quality and service around 20% of both the gender gave
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
any
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "comments'" or "comment's"?
comments
addition to pie chart 62% of all interviewers male and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfied
the proportion of those who are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
pleased
or had
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
any comment ranged between 20%.

IELTS academic The survey finds the opinion about shops and restaurant in shopping mall in New Zealand

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
199 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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