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The pie-chart shows data pertaining to the market share of three UK telecom service companies Vodafone, EE and O2 and the bar graph gives a record of the number of customers of company Vodafone from 1990 to 2007.

The pie-chart shows data pertaining to the market share of three UK telecom service companies Vodafone, EE and O2 and the bar graph gives a record of the number of customers of company Vodafone from 1990 to 2007. Jw2kE
The pie chart illustrates information pertaining to the industry share of three telecommunication industries Vodafone, EE and O2 as well as the Bar chart demonstrates the record of the Vodafone masses from 1990 to 2007. Overall, after glimpse look in the pie chart it can be seen that the there is a gigantic value for the vodafone share as compared with rest of the two competent that is 80. 5% percent. In the bar chart the number of consumers represented in millions with the 5 years of interval from 1990 to 2007 with five divisions. In the pie chart, the average share for the EE that is approximately four times lesser than the vodafone service. Additionally, the O2 service provider captured less market that is only 1. 5 percent. In the histogram, the peak number of users had been indentified in the year 2007 that was approximately 4. 5 million users. On the contrary, the less number can be seen in the year 1990 that was 1 million consumers. The consumption of the services escalated steadily with the five years of intervals till 2007.
The pie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
illustrates information pertaining to the industry share of three telecommunication industries Vodafone, EE and O2
as well
as the Bar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
demonstrates the record of the Vodafone masses from 1990 to 2007.

Overall
, after glimpse look in the pie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the there is a gigantic value for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
vodafone
share as compared with rest of the two competent
that is
80. 5% percent. In the bar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
the number of consumers represented in millions with the 5 years of interval from 1990 to 2007 with five divisions.

In the pie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
, the average share for the EE
that is
approximately four times lesser than the
Possible spelling mistake found.
vodafone
service.
Additionally
, the O2 service provider captured less market
that is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
1. 5 percent.

In the histogram, the peak number of users had been
Possible spelling mistake found.
indentified
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2007 that was approximately 4. 5 million users.
On the contrary
, the less number can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1990 that was 1 million consumers. The consumption of the services escalated
steadily
with the five years of intervals till 2007.
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IELTS academic The pie-chart shows data pertaining to the market share of three UK telecom service companies Vodafone, EE and O2 and the bar graph gives a record of the number of customers of company Vodafone from 1990 to 2007.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
184 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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