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The pie chart compare the proportion of different transportation means, which were commonly operated in Cambridge over the course of ten years starting in 2008.

The pie chart compare the proportion of different transportation means, which were commonly operated in Cambridge over the course of ten years starting in 2008. EL5KM
The provided charts illustrate how the rate of ubiquitous vehicles operated in Cambridge, UK over the course of ten years, starting from 2008. Overall, it can be seen that the percentage of people using bicycles and walking experienced an upward trend with the exception of cars and buses, which had the opposite tendency. Cars were the types of transportation that people used the most in 2008. Whereas, the year 2018 witnessed a significant decreased of 22% in the number of cars used, which hit the lowest point at 20% after the examined years. While a negligible declined of 5 percent was seen in the population of people using buses. On the other hand, the proportion of people cycling and walking became more common in Cambridge. There was a substantial increase of 13 percent in the number of bicycles used, which was the dominant source, registering a markedly higher figure than that for the others means of transportation. Similarly, the percentage of people walking experienced a double growth after a decade.
The provided charts illustrate how the rate of ubiquitous vehicles operated in Cambridge, UK over the course of ten years, starting from 2008.

Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
using bicycles and walking experienced an upward trend
Consider using "except" or "except for"
with the exception of
cars and buses, which had the opposite tendency.

Cars were the types of transportation that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
the most in 2008. Whereas, the year 2018 witnessed a significant decreased of 22% in the number of cars
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
, which hit the lowest point at 20% after the examined years.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
a negligible declined of 5 percent was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the population of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
using buses.

On the other hand
, the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cycling and walking became more common in Cambridge. There was a substantial increase of 13 percent in the number of bicycles
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
, which was the dominant source, registering a
markedly
higher figure than that for the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "others'" or "other's"?
others
means of transportation.
Similarly
, the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
walking experienced a double growth after a decade.
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IELTS academic The pie chart compare the proportion of different transportation means, which were commonly operated in Cambridge over the course of ten years starting in 2008.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
170 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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