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The graph below shows average yearly rainfall in Moscow and San Francisco.

The graph below shows average yearly rainfall in Moscow and San Francisco. drkBp
The given illustration provides details about the average amount of rainfull in each month of two different cities which are San Francisco and Moscow. Overall, while the rainfull in San Francisco dramatically fluctuated, the proportion in Moscow merely showed a marginal volatility over a year. San Francisco expericenced widely varied rainfall over 12 months. January, February was a period which hit the highest point at under 120mm in a year. However, in the next time, the amount of rainfull started to fall. It led to the rainfull from March to June showed a downtrend trend from around 40 to under 5mm. Specially, June and July were two driest months in year with no rainfull. Nevertheless, in the last period, the amount of precipitation started to grow substantially again and reached a peak at around 120mm in December. In contrast, the rainfull’s amount in Moscow did not too changed. From January to April, there was a slight decline from 65mm to under 40mm. Nonetheless, in the next time, the rainfull showed an upward trend and had an enormous clim to hit a peak at 90mm in June. After that, in the later period, it continued to show a downward trend from over 80mm to under 50mm.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
illustration provides
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
about the average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
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rainfull
in each month of two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cities which are San Francisco and Moscow.

Overall
, while the
Possible spelling mistake found.
rainfull
in San Francisco
dramatically
fluctuated, the proportion in Moscow
merely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a marginal volatility over a year.

San Francisco
Possible spelling mistake found.
expericenced
widely
varied rainfall over 12 months. January, February was a period which hit the highest point at under
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "120 mm"
120mm
in a year.
However
, in the
next
time, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
rainfull
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to fall. It led to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
rainfull
from March to June
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a downtrend trend from around 40 to under
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "5 mm"
5mm
.
Specially
, June and July were two driest months in year with no
Possible spelling mistake found.
rainfull
.
Nevertheless
, in the last period, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of precipitation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to grow
substantially
again and reached a peak at around
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "120 mm"
120mm
in December.

In contrast
, the
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rainfull
’s
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amount
in Moscow did not too
The verb 'did' requires base form of the verb: "change"
changed
. From January to April, there was a slight decline from
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "65 mm"
65mm
to under
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "40 mm"
40mm
. Nonetheless, in the
next
time, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
rainfull
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
an upward trend and had an enormous
Possible spelling mistake found.
clim
to hit a peak at
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "90 mm"
90mm
in June. After that, in the later period, it continued to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
a downward trend from over
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "80 mm"
80mm
to under
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "50 mm"
50mm
.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows average yearly rainfall in Moscow and San Francisco.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
205 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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