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The given table gives the information about the research taking place in Scotland about the involvement in different cultural activities of different age groups; 16-74 over a 12-month period.

The given table gives the information about the research taking place in Scotland about the involvement in different cultural activities of different age groups; 16-74 over a 12-month period. xD67y
The given table gives the information about the research taking place in Scotland about the involvement in different cultural activities of different age groups; 16-74 over a 12-month period. The unit is measured by percentage. Overall it can be seen that participation in any performance and crafts were the most popular for all age groups. The 16-24 age group involved the most in any performance with 35% and following any visual arts was with 30% respectively. By contrast, other activities were much lower such as computer based interest only by 10%. Regarding the elderly people, 25-44 group, the highest rate of participants in any activities was 22% in any performance and the second was with 17% in undertaking any crafts. Like a cross mask, 22% in any craft was involved by the 45-74 age group and 17% was undertaken in any performance. Similarly, both age groups were less interested in computers so also less involved in writing. Turning to the all aged 16 and over, it is evident that performance and crafts were the most popular at over 19% whereas cultural purchases and visual arts were slightly less popular with 16% and 15% respectively. Finally, the least interest was shown in writing and computing.
The
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given
table gives the information about the research taking place in Scotland about the involvement in
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different
cultural activities of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
; 16-74 over a 12-month period. The unit
is measured
by percentage.
Overall
it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that participation in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
and
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crafts
were the most popular for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
. The 16-24
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
involved the most in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
with 35% and following any visual arts was with 30%
respectively
.

By contrast, other activities were much lower such as computer based interest
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
by 10%. Regarding the elderly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, 25-44
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
, the highest rate of participants in any activities was 22% in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
and the second was with 17% in undertaking any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crafts
. Like a cross mask, 22% in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
craft
was involved
by the 45-74
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
and 17% was undertaken in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
.
Similarly
, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
were less interested in computers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
also
less involved in writing.

Turning to the all aged 16 and over, it is evident that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crafts
were the most popular at over 19% whereas cultural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchases
and visual arts were
slightly
less popular with 16% and 15%
respectively
.
Finally
, the least interest
was shown
in writing and computing.
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IELTS academic The given table gives the information about the research taking place in Scotland about the involvement in different cultural activities of different age groups; 16-74 over a 12-month period.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
204 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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