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The diagram shows the process of the water treatment.

The diagram shows the process of the water treatment. PVP32
The given pictorial represents means of water harvesting phenomenon. The three means through which we can harvest water, given the situation that man now a days is depleting the sources of ground water. Harvesting water can help earth to regain its natural water level. First given is the water collected through dams and sent to the water treatment plants, which can further be shared with the households for the common usage like gardening. Secondly, we can storm water directly to the rainwater tanks from the roof. Water can get stored into the tank either through pipe connection or one can remove the lid and let the water get stored. Water in this case can be used to flush, cleaning, gardening and other non drinking purposes. Once used, this used water can be shared with the storm water treatment or wastewater treatment plant, once cleaned, water can be shared back to the homes for further usage of cleaning and gardening. Rest of the excess treated water can be either disposed off to the sewage plants or for stormwater treatment.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
pictorial represents means of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
harvesting phenomenon.

The three means through which we can harvest
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water
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the situation that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
Did you mean "nowadays"?
now a days
is depleting the sources of ground
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
. Harvesting
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water
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
earth to regain its natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
level.

First
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
is the
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water
collected through dams and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
plants, which can
further
be shared
with the households for the common usage like gardening.

Secondly
, we can storm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
directly
to the rainwater tanks from the roof.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Water
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
stored into the tank either through pipe connection or one can remove the lid and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
stored.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Water
in this case
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to flush, cleaning, gardening and other
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
non drinking
purposes. Once
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
can
be shared
with the storm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
or wastewater
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
plant, once cleaned,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
can
be shared
back to the homes for
further
usage of cleaning and gardening. Rest of the excess treated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
can be either disposed off to the sewage plants or for stormwater
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
.
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IELTS academic The diagram shows the process of the water treatment.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
178 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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