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The charts show the percentage of male and female students choosing science subjects in one university in 1992 and 2012 and the three most popular science subjects which they studied.

The charts show the percentage of male and female students choosing science subjects in one university in 1992 and 2012 and the three most popular science subjects which they studied. QEdL
The diagram illustrates the comparison of the science courses taken by the university’s students and the students’ gender distribution, both in 1992 and 2012. The units are measured in the percentage. Overall, the subjects are mostly taken by male students for both of the year 1992 and 2002. However, the distribution of male pupils who decided to take science courses were tend to be dominant in 1992, in comparison with 2012. In 2012, only a slight gap of percentage could be found between the gender distribution, in which the female students approximately only 5% percent lower than the male students. On the other hand, there was a shift of the students’ preferences in choosing science courses. In 1992, Biology was the most preferred courses to be taken. It reached the percentage of between 60% to 70%, while Physics was only a little bit higher than 20% and Computer Science was still far from reaching 10%. Nevertheless, in 2012, the percentage of Biology dropped to approximately 40% and Computer Science started to take its turn into a percentage of more than 20%. Meanwhile, the Physics course had no significant change in the preferences of the students. It only had a small decrease in the percentage, from slightly higher than 20% in 1992 into a 20% in 2012.
The diagram illustrates the comparison of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
taken by the university’s
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students
and the
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students’
gender distribution, both in 1992 and 2012. The units
are measured
in the percentage.

Overall
, the subjects are
mostly
taken by male
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
for both of the year 1992 and 2002.
However
, the distribution of male pupils who decided to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
were
Consider using a past participle here: "tended".
tend
to be dominant in 1992,
in comparison
with 2012. In 2012,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
a slight gap of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
could
be found
between the gender distribution, in which the female
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
approximately
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
5% percent lower than the male students.

On the other hand
, there was a shift of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
preferences in choosing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
. In 1992, Biology was the most preferred
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
to
be taken
. It reached the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of between 60% to 70%, while Physics was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
a
Reduce redundancy by using "little" or "bit".
little bit
higher than 20% and Computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
was
still
far from reaching 10%.
Nevertheless
, in 2012, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of Biology dropped to approximately 40% and Computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to take its turn into a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of more than 20%. Meanwhile, the Physics
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
had no significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the preferences of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. It
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
had a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
decrease in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
, from
slightly
higher than 20% in 1992 into a 20% in 2012.
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IELTS academic The charts show the percentage of male and female students choosing science subjects in one university in 1992 and 2012 and the three most popular science subjects which they studied.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
216 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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Lexical Resource: 5.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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Task Achievement: 5.5
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