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the chart shows the visitors to four European nations

the chart shows the visitors to four European nations aQWPo
The given bar chart manifests the number of predicted travelers from the US, Canada and Mexico to visit the famous cities including Roma, Marid, Paris and Liverpool in the year 2018. From an overall perspective, the best-case scenario was seen in the number of American tourists in 4 locations while Mexican travelers account for the least. It is clearly evident that the American visitors account for the highest number in all four cities in 2018, while the Mexican travelers make up the lowest number in almost all cities except for Paris during the same year. According to the chart, Marid is the most attractive place for American visitors, about 100 thousand people, the figure for Roma is about 20% lower. The number of Canadian and Mexican visiting Marid are approximately 80 and 70 thousand people, respectively, while the figures for Roma are roughly 50 and 20 thousand, correspondingly. Regarding the remaining cities, the number of American, Canadian and Mexican people visiting Paris fluctuate slightly between 62 and 64 thousand people, whilst the figures for Liverpool are around 50, 30 and 19 thousand people in the same period shown.
The
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given
bar chart manifests the
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number
of predicted travelers from the US, Canada and Mexico to visit the
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famous
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cities
including Roma,
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Marid
, Paris and Liverpool in the year 2018.

From an
overall
perspective, the best-case scenario was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the
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number
of American tourists in 4 locations while Mexican travelers account for the least.

It is
clearly
evident that the American visitors account for the highest
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number
in all four
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cities
in 2018, while the Mexican travelers
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make
up the lowest
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number
in almost all
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cities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
except for
Paris during the same year.

According to the chart,
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Marid
is the most attractive place for American visitors, about 100 thousand
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people
, the figure for Roma is about 20% lower. The
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number
of Canadian and Mexican visiting
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Marid
are approximately 80 and 70 thousand
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people
,
respectively
, while the figures for Roma are roughly 50 and 20 thousand,
correspondingly
.

Regarding the remaining
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cities
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of American, Canadian and Mexican
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
visiting Paris fluctuate
slightly
between 62 and 64 thousand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, whilst the figures for Liverpool are around 50, 30 and 19 thousand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the same period shown.

IELTS academic the chart shows the visitors to four European nations

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
188 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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