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The chart below shows the sales of handmade olive oil soaps to tourists in Turkey in 2015.

The chart below shows the sales of handmade olive oil soaps to tourists in Turkey in 2015. XVoOg
The line graph reveals data on the sales amount of handmade olive oil soaps which were sold to the tourists in Turkey in 2015. The sale amount is given in million lira. It is obvious that the highest sales were made in March 2015 while the average sales amount per month ranged from 100 to 200 million lira. Getting back to the details, Turkish olive oil soap makers sold soaps of 200 million Lira to the visitors in January 2015 which skyrocketed to 350 million Lira in March. The sales amount nosedived in the subsequent months and the drop continued until the July when it dipped to just over 100 million sales amount. During this time each month's sale declined by 50 million lira. Sales in August went up and it recorded twice as much sales amount as it was in the last month only to decline in the next month. With a slight increase, the sales amount nearly touched the 200 million lira again in December.
The line graph reveals data on the
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sales
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amount
of handmade olive oil soaps which
were sold
to the tourists in Turkey in 2015. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in
Use "a million" or use a number before 'million'.
million
Possible agreement error. The noun 'lira' seems to be countable, so consider using: "liras", "lire".
lira
. It is obvious that the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
were made
in March 2015 while the average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
month
ranged from 100 to 200
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
Possible agreement error. The noun 'lira' seems to be countable, so consider using: "liras", "lire".
lira
.

Getting back to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, Turkish olive oil soap makers sold soaps of 200
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
Lira to the visitors in January 2015 which skyrocketed to 350
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
Lira in March. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
nosedived in the subsequent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
months
and the drop continued until the July when it dipped to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
. During this time each month's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
declined by 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
Possible agreement error. The noun 'lira' seems to be countable, so consider using: "liras", "lire".
lira
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sales
in August went up and it recorded twice as much
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sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
as it was in the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
month
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to decline in the
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
month
. With a slight increase, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
nearly
touched the 200
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
Possible agreement error. The noun 'lira' seems to be countable, so consider using: "liras", "lire".
lira
again in December.
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IELTS academic The chart below shows the sales of handmade olive oil soaps to tourists in Turkey in 2015.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
167 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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