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The bar chart gives information about the percentage of jobless women in 4 different countries in Britain in 2013 and 2014 Looking at the graph, it is readily apparent that England, while Wales and Northern Ireland successfully decreased the unemployment rates among women, the figure for Scotland showed an upward trend.

The bar chart gives information about the percentage of jobless women in 4 different countries in Britain in 2013 and 2014 Looking at the graph, it is readily apparent that England, while Wales and Northern Ireland successfully decreased the unemployment rates among women, the figure for Scotland showed an upward trend. 1oW1W
The bar chart gives information about the percentage of jobless women in 4 different countries in Britain in 2013 and 2014 Looking at the graph, it is readily apparent that England, while Wales and Northern Ireland successfully decreased the unemployment rates among women, the figure for Scotland showed an upward trend. It is also of note that the unemployment rates of English women and Scottish women were remarkably higher than those in Wales and Northern Ireland. In 2013, the percentage of unemployed women in England stood at 6. 8%, followed by Scotland at 6. 1%. Meanwhile, the proportion of women who were out of work in Northern Ireland and Wales was relatively similar, with respective figures being 5. 4% and 5. 6%. A year later, the rate of unemployed women in Scotland experienced a slight increase to 6. 7%, making it the highest figure in the year 2014. Such a trend was not seen in the figure for their counterparts in Wales and Northern Ireland, which went down to 4. 6% and 5. 0% respectively. Similarly, England also witnessed an insignificant drop, although to a larger extent, to 6. 5% in the unemployment rate.
The bar chart gives information about the percentage of jobless
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women
in 4
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries in Britain in 2013 and 2014

Looking at the graph, it is
readily
apparent that England, while Wales and Northern Ireland
successfully
decreased the unemployment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
for Scotland
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
an upward trend. It is
also
of note that the unemployment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
of English
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
and Scottish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
were
remarkably
higher than those in Wales and Northern Ireland.

In 2013, the percentage of unemployed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
in England stood at 6. 8%, followed by Scotland at 6. 1%. Meanwhile, the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
who were out of work in Northern Ireland and Wales was
relatively
similar, with respective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
being 5. 4% and 5. 6%.

A year later, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of unemployed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
in Scotland experienced a slight increase to 6. 7%, making it the highest
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figure
in the year 2014. Such a trend was not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
for their counterparts in Wales and Northern Ireland, which went down to 4. 6% and 5. 0%
respectively
.
Similarly
, England
also
witnessed an insignificant drop, although to a larger extent, to 6. 5% in the unemployment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
.
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IELTS academic The bar chart gives information about the percentage of jobless women in 4 different countries in Britain in 2013 and 2014 Looking at the graph, it is readily apparent that England, while Wales and Northern Ireland successfully decreased the unemployment rates among women, the figure for Scotland showed an upward trend.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
194 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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