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he bar chart compares the enrolment of men and women in full-time and part-time British further education programs in the 1970, 1980, and 1990 school years.

he bar chart compares the enrolment of men and women in full-time and part-time British further education programs in the 1970, 1980, and 1990 school years. YLdPN
The bar chart compares the enrolment of men and women in full-time and part-time British further education programs in the 1970, 1980, and 1990 school years. Overall, part-time education was several times more popular than full-time education throughout the entire period. In addition, while men had larger initial enrolment numbers in both part-time and full-time programs than women, by the end of the period women had surpassed men in part-time study and matched them in full-time. In regards to part-time education, male enrolment started in the 1970 school year at one million before dipping by about 150, 000 in the 1980 school year and then making a slight recovery to around 900 thousand students in 1990/91. In contrast, females started lower at about 775 thousand and rose steadily, finally surpassing males in the 1990 school year for a total of approximately 1, 100, 000. The trend for full-time education was only slightly different. Female numbers again started lower in the 1970 school year at under 100, 000 students but had already surpassed male totals by 1980. While male enrolments grew faster in the subsequent period, the final totals for both males and females in full-time education was more or less identical at around 220 thousand students in the 1990-91 school year.
The bar chart compares the
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolment' is British English.
enrolment
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women in full-time and part-time British
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
programs in the 1970, 1980, and 1990
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
years.

Overall
, part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
was several times more popular than full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
throughout the entire period.
In addition
, while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
had larger initial
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolment' is British English.
enrolment
numbers in both part-time and full-time programs than women, by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period women had surpassed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
in part-time study and matched them in full-time.

Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
In regards to
part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, male
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolment' is British English.
enrolment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
in the 1970
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
at one million
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
dipping by about 150, 000 in the 1980
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
and then making a slight recovery to around 900 thousand students in 1990/91.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
contrast, females
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
lower at about 775 thousand and rose
steadily
,
finally
surpassing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
males
in the 1990
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
for a total of approximately 1, 100, 000.

The trend for full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
slightly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
. Female numbers again
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
lower in the 1970
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
at under 100, 000 students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
had already surpassed male totals by 1980. While male
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolments' is British English.
enrolments
grew faster in the subsequent period, the final totals for both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
males
and females in full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
was more or less identical at around 220 thousand students in the 1990-91
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
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IELTS academic he bar chart compares the enrolment of men and women in full-time and part-time British further education programs in the 1970, 1980, and 1990 school years.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
211 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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