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Demand for electricity in England during winter and summer

Demand for electricity in England during winter and summer m8xDr
The graph shows electricity requirements, during a typical day of winter and summer, as well as the usage of it. It is evident the needs for electricity in both winter and summer periods are substantially changing. In the winter period, the usage of electricity increased rapidly to 40000 units. After this, it dipped dramatically to 30000 units. Moreover, in the evening time, it is steadily rising to the peak point. While in summer, it rose to 20000 units in the noontime, and in the evening, it dropped to 16000 units. In wintertime, the usage of electricity sharply increases from 20 o'clock to 22 o'clock, when in summer it is gradually rising from 13 o'clock to 15 o'clock. In addition, it is also noticeable that the utilization of electricity in both winter and summer from 6 o'clock to 9 o'clock is significantly different from other hours.
The graph
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shows
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electricity
requirements, during a typical day of
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winter
and
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summer
,
as well
as the usage of it. It is evident the needs for
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electricity
in both
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winter
and
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summer
periods are
substantially
changing.

In the
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winter
period, the usage of
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electricity
increased
rapidly
to 40000
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units
. After this, it dipped
dramatically
to 30000
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units
.
Moreover
, in the evening time, it is
steadily
rising to the peak point.

While in
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summer
, it rose to 20000
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units
in the noontime, and in the evening, it dropped to 16000
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units
. In wintertime, the usage of
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electricity
sharply
increases from 20
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o'clock
to 22
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o'clock
, when in
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summer
it is
gradually
rising from 13
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o'clock
to 15
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o'clock
.
In addition
, it is
also
noticeable that the utilization of
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electricity
in both
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winter
and
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summer
from 6
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o'clock
to 9
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o'clock
is
significantly
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different
from other hours.
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IELTS academic Demand for electricity in England during winter and summer

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
145 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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