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Bar Graph - coffee and tea buying habits in australia

Bar Graph - coffee and tea buying habits in australia yLaDg
The Bar chart illustrates a suvey's data which was conducted in 5 Austrailian Cities (Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide, Hobart) about coffee and tea drinking and buying habits of the people, by separating the habits into 3 categories (Bought fresh coffee in last 4 weeks, bought instant coffee in last 4 weeks and went to a cafe for coffee or tea in last 4 weeks). The bar chart displays the habits as percentage of total population of a city. Overall, more people in australia went to a cafe for coffee or tea in last 4 weeks, and less people in australia choose to buy fresh cofee in last 4 weeks. More number of People went to a cafe for coffee or tea in last 4 weeks in all the cities of Australia except Adelaide where more number of people bought instant coffee in last 4 weeks. More people went to a cafe for coffee or tea in last 4 weeks in Melbourne and less number of people choose going to a cafe in Adelaide. In sydney, the number of people went to a cafe for coffee or tea in last 4 weeks is just above 60% whereas the number of people who bought fresh coffee in last 4 weeks was a just below 45% making it the less popular choice by the people of sydney. This trend of people buying fresh coffee in last 4 weeks continues in all the cities. But in Adelaide number of people choose to buy instant coffee in last 4 weeks are just a little more than the number of people who went to a cafe for coffee or tea in the last 4 weeks. Both brisbane and adelaide has approximately similar percentage of population who bought fresh coffee in last 4 weeks. In Hobart more number of people choose buying instant coffee in last 4 weeks when compared to other Australian cities. In sydney more number of people who bought fresh coffee in last 4 weeks when compared to other 4 Australian cities where the survey was conducted.
The Bar chart illustrates a
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suvey
's data which
was conducted
in 5
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Austrailian
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Cities
(Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide, Hobart) about
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coffee
and
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tea
drinking and buying habits of the
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people
, by separating the habits into 3 categories (
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Bought
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fresh
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coffee
in last 4
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weeks
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in last 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weeks
and
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went
to a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
in last 4
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weeks)
. The bar chart displays the habits as percentage of total population of a city.

Overall
, more
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people
in
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australia
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went
to a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
in last 4
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weeks
, and
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun people is countable.
less
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people
in
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australia
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choose
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
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fresh
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cofee
in last 4
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weeks
. More
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
to a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
in last 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weeks
in all the
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cities
of Australia except Adelaide where more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in last 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weeks
. More
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
to a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
in last 4
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weeks
in Melbourne and less
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number
of
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people
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choose
If 'choose' is used as a verb, it usually requires the infinitive: "to go".
going
to a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
in Adelaide.

In
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sydney
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
to a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
in last 4
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weeks
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
above 60% whereas the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in last 4
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weeks
was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
below 45% making it the less popular choice by the
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people
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
sydney
. This trend of
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people
buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in last 4
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weeks
continues in all the
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cities
.
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But
in Adelaide
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in last 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weeks
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
to a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
in the last 4 weeks.

Both
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brisbane
and
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adelaide
has approximately similar percentage of population
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who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
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coffee
in last 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weeks
. In Hobart more
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
If 'choose' is used as a verb, it usually requires the infinitive: "to buy".
buying
instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in last 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weeks
when compared to other Australian
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cities
. In
Possible spelling mistake found.
sydney
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in last 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weeks
when compared to other 4 Australian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
where the survey
was conducted
.
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IELTS academic Bar Graph - coffee and tea buying habits in australia

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
343 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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