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TPO-43 - Integrated Writing Task Agnostids were a group of marine animals that became extinct about 450 million years ago. Agnostid fossils can be found in rocks in many areas around the world. From the fossil remains, we know that agnostids were primitiv

TPO-43 - Integrated Writing Task Agnostids were a group of marine animals that became extinct about 450 million years ago. Agnostid fossils can be found in rocks in many areas around the world. From the fossil remains, we know that agnostids were primitiv QLKP9
Reading and lecture discuss some theories about agnostids' possible lifestyle. On the one hand, the writer proposes some theories, providing three reasons of support. However, the lecturer casts doubts on the claims made by the writer, saying that his statements have serious weaknesses. First, the agnostids weren't free-swimming predators as the writer sustains. This is because arthropods have large, well-developed eyes which help in tracking and catching the prey. Whereas, the agnostids used to have tiny, poorly-developed eyes, and in addition to this some were blind. At least they should have had another feature to help in the process of hunting, but no proof was found. Therefore, the agnostids could not have been free-swimming predators. Second, seafloor dwellers live in a localized area, and they occupy only a small geographical place, and moreover, seafloor dwellers do not move fast. The writer asserts that agnostids were seafloor dwellers because other primitive arthropods were living this way. Anyway, the lecturer refutes this idea, adding that agnostids occupied large geographical areas, and this means that they were moving fast from one place to another, on long distances. Thus, this standpoint is directly contradicted. Third, the last theory is not plausible as well, because parasites live on animals in small numbers. Otherwise, a large population of parasites can kill the animal. The proofs found in the fossils show that these marine animals used to live in large populations and, as a result, the last theory does not stand up.
Reading and lecture discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
theories
about
Possible spelling mistake found.
agnostids
' possible lifestyle. On the one hand, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writer
proposes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
theories
, providing three reasons of support.
However
, the lecturer casts doubts on the claims made by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writer
, saying that his statements have serious weaknesses.

First
, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
agnostids
weren't free-swimming predators as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writer
sustains. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
arthropods have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
, well-developed eyes which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in tracking and catching the prey. Whereas, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
agnostids
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to have tiny,
poorly
-developed eyes, and
in addition
to this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
were blind. At least they should have had another feature to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in the process of hunting,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
no proof
was found
.
Therefore
, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
agnostids
could not have been free-swimming predators.

Second, seafloor dwellers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a localized area, and they occupy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
geographical place, and
moreover
, seafloor dwellers do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writer
asserts that
Possible spelling mistake found.
agnostids
were seafloor dwellers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
other primitive arthropods were living this way. Anyway, the lecturer refutes this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, adding that
Possible spelling mistake found.
agnostids
occupied
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
geographical areas, and this means that they were moving
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
from one place to another, on long distances.
Thus
, this standpoint is
directly
contradicted.

Third, the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
theory
is not plausible
as well
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
parasites
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
on animals in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
numbers.
Otherwise
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
population of parasites can kill the animal. The proofs found in the fossils
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that these marine animals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
populations and,
as a result
, the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
theory
does not stand up.
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IELTS essay TPO-43 - Integrated Writing Task Agnostids were a group of marine animals that became extinct about 450 million years ago. Agnostid fossils can be found in rocks in many areas around the world. From the fossil remains, we know that agnostids were primitiv

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
245 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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