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These days More and more shops opens long hoursWhat are its Positive and negative developments ?

These days More and more shops opens long hoursWhat are its Positive and negative developments? 3agR5
The procurement of products has gone higher to render a quality goods to consumer. The amount of shops opening for long-lasting hours in these days are widely increasing. In this essay I will provide a personal, professional development in positive manner and for negative manner is health issues. Perhaps the most compelling reason for shops to open for long hours is personal ways. The job, which they are working in the store is a permanent business. In this business people going to sell their products to consumers with reasonable prices. These selling could make them a good income without any sceptical. Those profits could save them from paid marketing for their business, while they opens a new business branch. That branch growth could be result in wealthy, affluent and multi-crore. Secondly, the personal way business not be viewed in isolation. Another significant way of business is professional way. These business will have bolster from government for helping people. For example, if the business holders hire someone, there will be a business expansion. They will be able to provide huge employment opportunities, to open their shops till long hours, that able to result in more financials for business as well as for country. However, positive development is not only sector that to be aware off. There is a negative development that gives more impact on people who runs their business: stress levels will increase; work-life could imbalance; business loss would be unpredictable; and the most important impact on health issues, that could effect their family. In conclusion, to maintain business long-lasting the best solution is to hire employees. This would lead to better growth and good financials. To overcome negative development taking care of our health is the key factor.
The procurement of products has gone higher to render a quality
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "good"?
goods
to consumer. The amount of shops opening for long-lasting hours in these days are
widely
increasing. In this essay I will provide a personal, professional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
manner and for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
manner is health issues.

Perhaps the most compelling reason for shops to open for long hours is personal ways. The job, which they are working in the store is a permanent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. In this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
going to sell their products to consumers with reasonable prices. These selling could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
income without any
Possible spelling mistake. 'sceptical' is British English.
sceptical
. Those profits could save them from paid marketing for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
, while they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "open"
opens
a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
branch. That branch growth could be result in wealthy, affluent and multi-crore.

Secondly
, the personal way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
not
be viewed
in isolation. Another significant way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
is
Please check whether an article is missing: "a professional".
professional
way. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
will have bolster from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
for helping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
For example
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
holders hire someone, there will be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
expansion. They will be able to provide huge employment opportunities, to open their shops till long hours, that able to result in more financials for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
as well
as for country.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
sector that to be aware off. There is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
that gives more impact on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
Did you mean "run"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'people' should be used.
runs
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
:
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
levels will increase; work-life could imbalance;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
loss would be unpredictable; and the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
impact on health issues, that could
Did you mean "affect"?
effect
their family.

In conclusion
, to maintain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
long-lasting the best solution is to hire employees. This would lead to better growth and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
financials. To overcome
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
taking care of our health is the key factor.
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IELTS essay These days More and more shops opens long hoursWhat are its Positive and negative developments?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
289 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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