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Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now. Nard
It is often argued that the government must implement more rules to prevent crimes from happening around us, while some people currently believe that crimes are being handled successfully. Although people are more scared to be arrested nowadays due to drug campaigns of the government, I believe that there should be stricter rules to be implemented to stop people from committing any crimes. Nowadays, there are people who think that crime incidents are being tackled by the police force effectively due to more deployment of police workforce in the streets and visibility of checkpoints in crime-prone areas. For example, the police workforce in the Philippines has been rallying around the streets in Manila as their response from the aggressive anti-drug campaign of the government. They have also been arresting people who are in drug watch list which made the ordinary citizens feel safe knowing that drug addicts are no longer loitering in the streets. Although this move from the Police Department are beneficial in our society, there are still other people who think they are above the law and do not prevent them from doing other crimes. For instance, drugs are not the only culprit in every crime committed by a person. Others commit murder, corruption, or fraud which are also severe offenses and needs to be handled seriously by the police department as well. In order for the crime rates to decline in a more favorable manner, the judiciary department needs to implement stricter laws that will make a person think twice before committing something heinous. Severe offenses such as murder and corruption need to have much bigger penalties and prison sentence regardless of their social status in life. In conclusion, I believe that tackling of crimes can only be effective if crime rates are declining in our society. Regardless of the type of criminality, the government should have more stricter laws to implement and heavier prison sentence in order to prevent people from committing serious crimes.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
implement more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
from happening around us, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
currently
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are
being handled
successfully
. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more scared to
be arrested
nowadays due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
campaigns of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, I believe that there should be stricter
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
to
be implemented
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from committing any crimes.

Nowadays, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
incidents are
being tackled
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
force
effectively
due to more deployment of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
workforce in the streets and visibility of checkpoints in crime-prone areas.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
workforce in the Philippines has been rallying around the streets in Manila as their response from the aggressive anti-drug campaign of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. They have
also
been arresting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
list which made the ordinary citizens feel safe knowing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
addicts are no longer loitering in the streets.

Although this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Police
Department are beneficial in our society, there are
still
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they are above the law and do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
them from doing other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
are not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
culprit in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
committed by a person. Others commit murder, corruption, or fraud which are
also
severe offenses and needs to
be handled
seriously
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
department
as well
. In order for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates to decline in a more favorable manner, the judiciary department needs to implement stricter laws that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
twice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
committing something heinous. Severe offenses such as murder and corruption need to have much bigger penalties and prison sentence regardless of their social status in life.

In conclusion
, I believe that tackling of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be effective if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates are declining in our society. Regardless of the type of criminality, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should have
Use only "stricter" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more stricter
laws to implement and heavier prison sentence in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from committing serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
.
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IELTS essay Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
328 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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