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Should government invest in Arts or in Public Services? To what extent do you agree?

Should government invest in Arts or in Public Services? E306Q
The government spends a substantial part of its budget these days, not just on public works, but also on the arts. Though spending money on public services is necessary, I don’t think spending on the arts is a waste of money. There are many reasons that a substantial amount of the government budget is spent on public services. First and foremost, things like hospitals, highways, and schools, are public facilities and these things decide the quality of life that most of us will have. For instance, the health of our society will decline if the government does not spend enough money on hospitals. Similarly, our children will not be adequately educated if there is not enough money spent on schools. Also, if we do not spend enough on these things, the poor in our society will be more affected. This does not suggest, however, that the arts should be entirely ignored. To begin with, it is difficult for many arts organizations to make a lot of profit, so many theatres and other such venues will have to close without any government assistance. In addition, the arts also have an important influence on our quality of life. Many citizens are very fond of music and theatre shows, so it is important for the government to fund those organizations so that they can continue to provide entertainment to the public. To sum up, there are obvious advantages of ensuring that a significant amount of money goes into public services and for almost all of us, this affects the quality of life. That said, I don’t think spending money on the arts is a waste of money, as it also offers major advantages.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
spends a substantial part of its budget these days, not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
works,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
. Though spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
services is necessary, I don’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
spending on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
is a waste of money.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons that a substantial amount of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
budget
is spent
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
services.
First
and foremost, things like hospitals, highways, and schools, are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
facilities and these things decide the quality of life that most of us will have.
For instance
, the health of our society will decline if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
does not spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on hospitals.
Similarly
, our children will not be
adequately
educated if there is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
spent on schools.
Also
, if we do not spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
on these things, the poor in our society will be more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
.

This does not suggest,
however
, that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
should be
entirely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, it is difficult for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
organizations to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
profit,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatres' is British English.
theatres
and other such venues will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
close without any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
assistance.
In addition
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
also
have an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
influence on our quality of life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
citizens are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
fond of music and
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to fund those organizations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can continue to provide entertainment to the public.

To sum up, there are obvious advantages of ensuring that a significant amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
goes into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
services and for almost all of us, this affects the quality of life. That said, I don’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
is a waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, as it
also
offers major advantages.
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IELTS essay Should government invest in Arts or in Public Services?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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