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Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. 6308
Social networking sites, for instance Facebook, are thought by a number of to have had a detrimental effect on individual people as well as society and local communities. However, while I believe that such sites are mainly beneficial to the individual, I agree that they have had a damaging effect on local communities. With regard to individuals, the impact that online social media has had on each individual person has clear advantages. Firstly, people from various countries are brought together through such sites as Facebook whereas prior to the development of technology and social networking sites, people rarely had the chance to meet or communicate with anyone outside their immediate circle or community. Secondly, Facebook also has social groups which offer individuals a chance to meet and participate in discussions with people who share common interests. To conclude, although social networking sites have brought individuals closer together, they have not had the same effect on society or local communities. Local communities should do more to try to involve local people in local activities in order to promote the future of community life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Social
networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
,
for instance
Facebook, are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
by a number of to have had a detrimental effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
as well
as society and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communities
.
However
, while I believe that such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
are
mainly
beneficial to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that they have had a damaging effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communities
. With regard to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
, the impact that online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media has had on each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
person has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
advantages.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from various countries
are brought
together through such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
as Facebook whereas prior to the development of technology and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
rarely had the chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
or communicate with anyone outside their immediate circle or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
.
Secondly
, Facebook
also
has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
groups which offer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
and participate in discussions with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who share common interests.

To conclude
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
have brought
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
closer together, they have not had the same effect on society or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communities
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communities
should do more to try to involve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
activities in order to promote the future of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
life.

IELTS essay Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
182 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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