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Describe an electronic device you use often

Describe an electronic device you use often AjgbM
It provides me with dozens of beneficial features such as contacting people, taking photos, setting alarm or listening to music. However, the most important function to me is to keep in touch with my family members and friends by chatting, texting messages, giving phone calls, or making video calls. For example, my parents live about 100 kilometers from me but thanks to video calls, I can talk with them and see them clearly as if I can meet them in person. In other words, it helps me to reduce the distance with my relatives who stay far away from me. Moreover, my smartphone is also great for entertaining activities. I can use it to surf webs, watch movies online or play music. For instance, when I do housework at home, I feel relaxed as I can cook delicious meals and listen to my favourite songs at the same time. All in all, my smartphone is highly appreciated for multi-functions it can serve me. If I didn’t have it, I wouldn’t be able to communicate well with other people and enjoy my life so much.
It provides me with dozens of beneficial features such as contacting
people
, taking photos, setting alarm or listening to music.
However
, the most
important
function to me is to
keep
in touch with my family members and friends by chatting, texting messages, giving phone calls, or making video calls.
For example
, my parents
live
about 100 kilometers from me
but
thanks to video calls, I can talk with them and
see
them
clearly
as if I can
meet
them in person.
In other words
, it
helps
me to
reduce
the distance with my relatives who stay far away from me.

Moreover
, my smartphone is
also
great for entertaining activities. I can
use
it to surf webs,
watch
movies online or play music.
For instance
, when I do housework at home, I feel relaxed as I can cook delicious meals and listen to my
favourite
songs at the same time.

All in all, my smartphone is
highly
appreciated for multi-functions it can serve me. If I didn’t have it, I wouldn’t be able to communicate well with other
people
and enjoy my life
so
much.
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IELTS essay Describe an electronic device you use often

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
184 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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