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Ownership of mobile phones has risen dramatically in recent years despite the potentially harmful effects they may have on our health and on society. Government should introduce measures to restrict ownership of mobile phones to those who need them for their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Ownership of mobile phones has risen dramatically in recent years despite the potentially harmful effects they may have on our health and on society. Government should introduce measures to restrict ownership of mobile phones to those who need them for their work. with this statement? OqQM
Mobile phones have become prevalent in our society and also have received a range of suggestions as to how they should be used. A few individuals assert that government should regulate the phone usage and make it available to only people who utilize it for work. However, even though I admit phones are harmful, I think restrictions like these are not effective in a long run. On the one hand, apart from work related activities, cell phones are useful in many ways. Education, firstly, is one such sector where these e-gadgets can be extremely important. In other words, students all over the world learn a wide range of lessons using phones and internet. Take online classes, for instance, in this time of COVID19 pandemic, phones worked as a saviour for both schools and students. Besides education, a great number of people are dependent on mobile phones to communicate with each other as phones have made it easier by connecting people whether they live next door or are even on moon. This is why imaging a life without a phone is a nightmare for many. On the other hand, it is also undeniable that mobile phones are disadvantageous. Due to high dependency on phones, several individuals are facing problems of phone-addiction. They always have a constant urge to check their social media updates, to play games on phone, to chat with others and so forth, which means constant disturbance in their work or study. This is the reason why few people think that phones should be restricted. Nevertheless, as long as we pledge to use phones only for productive purposes such as to learn something, to convey important information or to solve problems, cell-phones are not devils that we should worry about. In conclusion, although many a time phones are the reason behind reduced productivity of people, they serve humanity with numerous benefits, and therefore I opine they should not be restricted.
Mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
have become prevalent in our society and
also
have received a range of suggestions as to how they should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
. A few individuals assert that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should regulate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
usage and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it available to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who utilize it for work.
However
,
even though
I admit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are harmful, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
restrictions like these are not effective in a long run.

On the one hand, apart from work related activities, cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are useful in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways. Education,
firstly
, is one such sector where these e-gadgets can be
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, students all over the world learn a wide range of lessons using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and internet. Take online classes,
for instance
, in this time of
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
COVID19
pandemic,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
worked as a
Possible spelling mistake found.
saviour
for both schools and students.
Besides
education, a great number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are dependent on mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
to communicate with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
have made it easier by connecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
whether they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
next
door or are even on moon. This is why imaging a life without a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
is a nightmare for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, it is
also
undeniable that mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are disadvantageous. Due to high dependency on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
, several individuals are facing problems of phone-addiction. They always have a constant urge to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
their social media updates, to play games on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
, to chat with others and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
forth, which means constant disturbance in their work or study. This is the reason why few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
should
be restricted
.
Nevertheless
, as long as we pledge to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for productive purposes such as to learn something, to convey
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
information or to solve problems, cell-phones are not devils that we should worry about.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
a time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are the reason behind
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
productivity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, they serve humanity with numerous benefits, and
therefore
I opine they should not
be restricted
.
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IELTS essay Ownership of mobile phones has risen dramatically in recent years despite the potentially harmful effects they may have on our health and on society. Government should introduce measures to restrict ownership of mobile phones to those who need them for their work. with this statement?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Ownership of mobile phones has risen dramatically in recent years despite the potentially harmful effects they may have on our health and on society. Government should introduce measures to restrict ownership of mobile phones to those who need them for their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?