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It is important for children to take extra classes or play after school? Discuss both and give your opinions.

It is important for children to take extra classes or play after school? bYO0q
one of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is collosal upsurge in attending extra classes after school. There is a widespread worry that this will lead to a myriad of concerns in one's life. However, I do not entirely accept this and I will explain why in this essay. There are a number of arguments in favour of my stance The most preponderant one is that paying extra for tuitions can not only contribute to wastage of time, but also lead to numerous other benefits in various fields. Thanks to the wide range of advantages it offers, not only can one benefit more when it comes to being effective, but they can also enhance the productivity and quality of their lives, with much ease, efficacy and convenience. Needlessto say, all theese merits stand one in good stead, as far as augmenting their chances of prosperityan and excellence is concerned. There are, However, some pitfalls that can easily overwhelm the potential benefits of going for extra classes after school. The primary one stems from the fact that by observing the aforementioned trend, people have not only realised its gravity, but also gauged the magnitude of its repercussions whenit comes to today's ever-changing lifestyle. Besides, its impact on coaching classes is far-reaching indeed. Hence, it is apparent why many are against to go for extra classes after school. In view of arguments outlined above, one can conclude that despite some drawbacks, the benefits of pay for tuition are indeed to great to ignore.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
one
of the most conspicuous trends of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world is
Possible spelling mistake found.
collosal
upsurge in attending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
after school. There is a widespread worry that this will lead to a myriad of concerns in one's life.
However
, I do not
entirely
accept this and I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why in this essay.

There are a number of arguments in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of my stance The most preponderant one is that paying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
for
Possible spelling mistake found.
tuitions can
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
contribute to wastage of time,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
lead to numerous other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
in various fields. Thanks to the wide range of advantages it offers, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefit
more when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to being effective,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they can
also
enhance the productivity and quality of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, with much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
, efficacy and convenience.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Needlessto
say, all
Possible spelling mistake found.
theese
merits stand one in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
stead, as far as augmenting their chances of
Possible spelling mistake found.
prosperityan
and excellence
is concerned
.

There are,
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
pitfalls that can
easily
overwhelm the potential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
of going for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
after school. The primary one stems from the fact that by observing the aforementioned trend,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Possible spelling mistake. 'realised' is British English.
realised
its gravity,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
gauged the magnitude of its repercussions
Possible spelling mistake found.
whenit
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's ever-changing lifestyle.
Besides
, its impact on coaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
is far-reaching
indeed
.
Hence
, it is apparent why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
are against to go for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
after school.

In view of arguments outlined above, one can conclude that despite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
of pay for tuition are
indeed
Did you mean "too"?
to
great to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
.
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IELTS essay It is important for children to take extra classes or play after school?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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