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Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.4

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. v. 4
It is argued that all undergraduates in universities ought to major in their preferred areas, whereas others think that it is more beneficial for their future to study modern subjects such as science and technology. While allowing students to study their favorable subjects would encourage them to learn better, I believe that focusing on contemporary subjects qualifies them to labor market. On the one hand, it is perfectly reasonable to think that university students should study their favorite topics because this would fire enthusiasm to learn. If students choose whatever they like, this will encourage them to passionately delve into them, which would likely not only improve their practical skills, but also their theoretical ones. For example, same initiative in Japan has resulted in graduating knowledgeable and skillful members. However, it does not make any sense for me to turn a blind eye to the importance of modern topics in the AI-equipped era. On the other hand, studying physics and science is an idea to be appreciated as these would play a pivotal role when it comes finding a profession in the future. As technology progresses in a starling pace, learners have to acquire up-to-date information in order to keep themselves abreast of the up-to-minute technological advancements. Recent Canadian study revealed that given that these topics were paid a special attention in universities, this would contribute to improving graduates' personal qualifications, which is certainly essential in terms of meeting the requirements of modern labor market. I, therefore, believe that educational institutes have to involve students in contemporary topics, if they are heading to offer them better recruitment opportunities. In conclusion, even though allowing students to study their preferred topics would confer them on a better learning experience, I feel that keeping a vigilant eye on recent subjects is a good idea for graduates' careers.
It
is argued
that all undergraduates in universities ought to major in their preferred areas, whereas others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is more beneficial for their future to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as science and technology. While allowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
their favorable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
would encourage them to learn better, I believe that focusing on contemporary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
qualifies them to labor market.

On the one hand, it is
perfectly
reasonable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
their favorite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
topics
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this would fire enthusiasm to learn. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
choose whatever they like, this will encourage them to
passionately
delve into them, which would likely not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their practical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
their theoretical ones.
For example
, same initiative in Japan has resulted in graduating knowledgeable and skillful members.
However
, it does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
any sense for me to turn a blind eye to the importance of modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
topics
in the AI-equipped era.

On the other hand
, studying physics and science is an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
to
be appreciated
as these would play a pivotal role when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
finding a profession in the future. As technology progresses in a starling pace, learners
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
acquire up-to-date information in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
themselves abreast of the up-to-minute technological advancements. Recent Canadian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
revealed that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
topics
were paid
a special attention in universities, this would contribute to improving graduates' personal qualifications, which is
certainly
essential in terms of meeting the requirements of modern labor market. I,
therefore
, believe that educational institutes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
involve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in contemporary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
topics
, if they are heading to offer them better recruitment opportunities.

In conclusion
,
even though
allowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
their preferred
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
topics
would confer them on a better learning experience, I feel that keeping a vigilant eye on recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
for graduates' careers.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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